So, I know I haven’t really blogged all week, and there is actually a reason for that. But I’ll save announcements for next week.
Anyways, I’ve been feeling kind of…bleh…lately so I think Free Write Friday is a perfect time to get back into the blogging scene.
See, I’ve been talking with my family a lot recently and I discovered something! I’m a people person! Really! I always thought of myself as the shy one. The one who could be alone, introverted and content with silence. But I’ve figured it out recently that I’m NOT! Amazing, right? I’m the kind of person that NEEDS to connect with people, which I don’t think is unique at all. I think we all desire to be connected with – to interact with people. We are wired that way! So when I got into the habit of working in an empty apartment all day and then watching a movie after an uneventful dinner, I started getting in this funk and I just couldn’t shake it! When I told my twin, Leta, what was going on, she pointed out that not seeing people hardly ever probably had something to do with it. Hm. Was it possible? Was I lonely? I think I was, and it was unusual for me because that’s not something I slip into easily.
It was hard to figure out because I was still seeing my roommates for a few hours at night and seeing my parents occasionally and then it HIT me like a ton of bricks. As valuable as “with-ness” is, it’s not enough! Don’t get me wrong, I love with-ness, but it’s not enough to talk about surface issues (“Hi, how was your day?” “Good, how was yours?”). Those aren’t conversations that make me feel alive or needed or valued or connected. Don’t we all have more to offer than that? I feel like I do; I want to talk about life and how we understand things and help people understand what they’re feeling or going through. (I like to pretend that I’m a brilliant psychologist too) . Or to express what I feel and am going through. Connecting with people – through tears and talks, struggles and strife, smiles and big belly laughs – that’s what I love. I don’t want to just be a shell of person that can politely exchange pleasantries. I want to know the hearts of the people around me, and for them to know mine. We were created to live in community – to be together – and to invest in each other. I’m afraid I’ve been failing in that. I feel joy and excitement and a rush when I can talk about an important issue – to listen to other opinions and to share mine, to understand where we agree or disagree or learn from someone else’s experiences. I once read something that said, “Good conversation is as stimulating as a cup of coffee — and just as hard to sleep after.” I think that’s so true. I think one of humanity’s true joys is to be heard, to know you – and your words – have significance. So if anyone ever wants to talk about the grace of God, the state of man, politics, dreams for the future, regrets of the past, why relationships are so hard or do a comparison of history and the present, I’m all for it!
In a world that’s desperate to connect, let’s not let Facebook and Twitter get in the way of actually connecting, of truly investing, and whole-heartedly living in community with the people around us. It’s a pretty lonely place if we don’t.
Happy Weekend everyone!